Bittersweet

So I woke up this morning to the realization that I won't be sleeping in this bed in 17 days. I won't have my bedroom, my house, my neighborhood, my city, everything I've grown up in and settled into because it was comfortable. So obviously this realization was very uncomfortable, and in my sleep-induced subconscious state, I gripped my bed, burying my head deeper into my pillow, as though it were going to be taken out from under me.

And yet it's exciting. New bed, new bedroom, new campus, new city. Everything new. I don't necessarily oppose change, but I don't know if I sponsor it either. I think I try my best to just go with the flow and adapt, but I also try not to forget the former state of things before the change. Every big event still has a place in my heart. Whether I choose to acknowledge the bad things and let them define my existence, that's a whole other battle on its own. But made easy by the fact that I don't have to feel guilty or ashamed. Going off to college is not a bad thing. :)

So this bittersweet reality becomes more and more prevalent in my perspective, suffocating the carefree ignorance I allow myself every summer. And though I have most everything done, registered for classes, dorm supplies bought, got laptop, met roommate, (via facebook of course, it's the only way to communicate now don't you know?) I still feel unprepared for the lifestyle change that awaits me, considering I'm very comfortable with being comfortable. And there's future things to think about, like GETTING A JOB, paying off debts, balancing school work and social life.

Responsibility- what a pain in the ass ;) other conclusion of the day: I hate money.